The Ring

[[Special thanks to my dear friend Sarah who helped me to realize that I'm okay in real life and not "so much better as a blog"]]

There are moments in life that we all look forward to. As kids we itch with anticipation if we have just a little money to spend or we count days until our birthday or Christmas. Then we get older and get excited about driving or getting a job or graduating. For a girl, though, there's one dream that she hangs on to from the time she's very small. Every girl, at some point in her life, thinks of her Prince Charming.

Unfortunately, a lot of girls think that once she finally has her man, life will be perfect. But there's enough people out there talking about that problem. I, for one, have seen a slightly different problem. Even girls who are completely aware that life will still have ups AND downs seem to want a lover too desperately.

Why?

I think I figured it out because I started feeling the same way. My thoughts one day were along these lines: "I know that life won't be perfect when I'm married. It might even be more difficult. But I Must. Get. Married!" As soon as I had the thought, I wondered why I felt that way. I have the most incredible life ever! I have been blessed with so many friends around the country, so many opportunities to do things that I might not be able to do if I had a husband.

As happy as I am with my life, why did I feel like I needed to change it?

Change. That's the key word. See, so many people that I know (including myself) are constantly trying to change themselves to fit in better with their friends, family, church, and/or coworkers. We have so many people that love us, but we second guess ourselves and think, "They only tolerate me. I need to ________ if I want to keep their friendship." We're haunted by the fact that people can just walk away without thinking about it when it would leave us devastated. Especially when it has happened before, the fear that it could happen again makes us sick.

That's why, in my mind, I needed a guy to marry me. Because some day he would get down on one knee and tell me that I was good enough just the way I was. Because he would put a ring on my finger that said to the world, "flaws and all, I want to share the rest of my existence with this woman."

I don't need that, though! I'm not saying that I don't ever want to get married. I'm just saying that I don't have to have a ring on my finger to prove anything to myself or to anyone else. I don't choose to spend a lot of time with people I don't like, so why would anyone else do that? If the people who spend time with me are at all like me, then the very fact that they choose to put up with me means that they care about me.

So the ring? Yeah, it'll be cool to have one some day. And it'll be nice to show the world that some guy loves me enough to claim me as his own. But until then? I'm just me, and even if I have room to grow, I'm blessed with many friends who think that I'm "good enough" the way I am.

Keep Swimming

Dory isn't always the smartest fish. Actually, she would drive me insane if I had to spend too much time with her. But I have to admit that she does have one good piece of advice: "Keep swimming!" I find myself singing her little ditty every once in awhile... sometimes just for fun and other times because it's a good way to lighten up a little when there's a crisis.

I think that another way of saying this is: "Be flexible!" Life has a way of taking unexpected turns, so it's best just to go with the flow. People will appreciate it and you'll feel a lot less beat up when everything is said and done! Sometimes flexibility is *very* easy for me. I don't get it when people are ticked off in slow traffic. I'm cool with last-minute plan changes. Annoying people do still annoy me, but usually I can shrug it off and not lose my temper. And if someone doesn't get what I'm saying? Hey... no need to get hot under the collar! I can explain it again a little differently!

Some things are harder to swim through, though. Worry for other people. Loss of any variety. Getting weighed down by the future. I think it's okay to take a moment to just sit still for a bit, but the important thing is that you pick up and get swimming again.

Sometimes we have to have help. Praying and/or talking to friends are good ways to get back in the right current. Knowing that you're not alone is SUCH a help when you're trying to swim through difficult circumstances.

Don't just sink to the bottom of the ocean and get bogged down in the sand. Keep swimming!

You know what you gotta do when life gets you down? 
Just keep swimming 
Just keep swimming
 Just keep swimming swimming swimming 
What do we do? We swim, swim, swim

On Purpose

I've had this video in my sidebar for some time now, but I'm not sure how many of you have seen it. Nick's story was brought up in church last Sunday, and something that he says has continually popped out at me throughout the week. Before I go into that, though, here's the video again:



What Nick says at about four minutes into the video really stood out to me. "It was done so that the works of God might be revealed through him." God had an ultimate purpose in giving Nick a life with no limbs. He had a purpose for giving the man in John 9 a life without sight.

To reveal Himself.


It's easy to look at these stories and say, "Wow. God was really able to show Himself through these people because of what they didn't have." But I started looking at it from another angle. Sure, Nick has a great platform because of his situation. But the truth is, God can be seen just as well in my life - if I'll let Him. God may have purposely made Nick without limbs in order to draw many to Himself... but He also made me with limbs for the same purpose!

I find it so easy to look at other people and see what God gave them (or didn't give them) to make them wonderful witnesses. The things that make them "better than me." This week I've been realizing, though, that God made me the way He did...

and He did it on purpose.

That's Not My Place

When Seth was younger I read him several books that are part of the Usborne "touchy feely" collection. These books are cardboard and have a bunch of different things for the little kids to feel. These stories were titled That's Not My _____. Tractor, airplane, monkey, car... you fill in the blank. As you turn each page, it shows a different tractor and the problem will be identified. It's seat is too scratchy. It's engine is too bumpy. The wheels are too.... The monkey's tail is too curly, the nose too cold. I can't even remember everything.

I caught myself playing this game. My problem? It's not MY mission field.

His pants are too baggy.

Her body is too pierced.

His speech is too coarse.

I want to brush off people instead of helping them because they don't fit into my picture of who I want to be associated with. But the truth is, I need to look at people the way God sees them.

"Yes, she's your mission field. Her heart is so broken."

"Yes, he's your mission field. He is searching for answers."

I don't really have a *lot* of opportunities for witnessing, but how many times am I ignoring the opportunities that I do have? And why is it so easy to forget....



I was once someone's mission field myself.